Introducing ...

Audrey Anne Smith was born on 7.27.10 at 8:15 pm weighing in at 7lbs and 15 oz. and was 20.5 inches long. She has black, curly hair and it goes down her neck and past her ears!

Monday evening I started feeling cramps. Tuesday morning I felt them as well, but started getting ready for the day anyway. Around 9:00 I noticed that these cramps were starting to feel like a little more than JUST cramps. I said to Joe,"Not to alarm you, but I may be in labor." I got ready for Devon's Movers and Shakers class and Joe went off to work. We decided that since it may be a while (if I was in labor at all) that it was fine to carry on with our day until things progressed a little more, but he would stay close to home in case we needed to go to the hospital. I was about to leave with Devon to his class, but had 2 contractions were were definitely painful and changed my mind ;) Around 11:15 my contraction were 3-6 minutes apart so we called Joe's Mom and Dad who volunteered to watch Devon and headed out to the hospital. One of my biggest concerns was for Devon through all of this, but he had a blast with Pops and Abuela who took him to their house to play with their dog, out for a fancy dinner of Mexican food and to Baskin Robbins for his very own scoop. It really put my mind at ease to know he was doing OK.

When I arrived I was 4 cm dilated and 80% effaced. My labor progressed well and over the next few hours and I was 5 cm dilated and 100% effaced. I finally had 3 made-me-cry-they-were-so-painful contractions and got my epidural. The epidural was SO much more painful than any contraction I had so far I was so caught off guard by how much pain I went through just to get to that point of not feeling any pain. After it set in, however, I was feeling great and by 8:11 I was ready to push. My doctor went home to have dinner and put her kids to bed so we were sort of waiting for her to get back. I KNOW that my body was ready well before they let me start pushing so my labor probably would have been shorter if I hadn't had to wait. Anyway, at 8:11 I started pushing. I know I started pushing at 8:11 because at that EXACT moment my sister, Katy, texted me to see if I was pushing yet ;) 4 minutes, 1 contraction and 2pushes later Audrey was born.

They laid her on my belly and I felt amazing! I was so happy to see her and I just could not get over that hair! All that dark, curly hair! Devon had pretty light hair when he was born and now it's practically blonde. Even though I knew she could have dark hair it was such a surprise to actually see it. All of Joe's sisters and Mom have curly black hair and I was born with black hair as well so it's not genetically strange I just wasn't expecting it. At any rate, she is totally adorable and I was so happy to hold her in my arms and know and she was healthy. I however, look a little wrecked.

My friend Jaime, my parents, Joe's parents and Crystal (Joe's sister) came by to visit me on Wednesday. Joe took Devon to his Movers and Shakers class (I am so proud of him for making the effort to keep Devon on a schedule), but came to visit me afterwards. Devon seemed happy to see me, but a little unsure of me at the same time. We didn't force an introduction between the new siblings so we didn't take any pictures, but Devon said,"Audrey!" and pointed at her bassinet. We took him over there and let him look at her and he was VISIBLY upset. He didn't cry, but it felt like he figured out what was going on and didn't like it. He seemed to move on from it almost immediately and then they left.

We stayed in the hospital the next day, but got to come home Thursday morning and I was so relieved to be back. I was so tired of being around all these random nurses I just wanted to be home with my little family. The relief was somewhat short lived because Devon was CLEARLY mad at me. He didn't look at me or say hi when I came home. He acted like I wasn't there. Like he saw right through me. Bru-tal. I sort of expected this so I tried to not let it bother me, but even the next day he wouldn't let me hold him, give him hugs or put him down for bedtime. I tried to, but he kept crying for his Daddy. Any other day in the history of his LIFE I would have loved for him to cry for his Daddy to do the bedtime routine since I pretty much do it (and love it) every night, but that night I was really sad. It felt like all the love and attention and care I had given him up til this point was washed away. I was at square one. I had to start over. I know that's not the case, but in my hormonal-just-given-birth-first-day-home-brain that's how it felt. I understand how he feels so it totally makes sense. Joe is like this bright, shiny new toy that Devon gets to see in the morning, the evening and on the weekend. All of a sudden I'm gone and his favorite toy is with him ALL THE TIME for days on end doing fun things with him that I never do. It's no wonder that he just wants his Daddy. I'm sure once Joe goes back to work and Devon and I get back into our routine it will get back to the way it was. He has definitely started coming around and I even took him with me to Target yesterday and we had a great time so I think things may be getting back to normal soon.

In spite of all her black, curly hair, I think Audrey and Devon do look quite similar in the face. Here is Audrey and I ...

and here is Devon and I.

I have really made the effort to not dote on Audrey when Devon is around. I try to have her laying where we are playing so he gets used to her being there without having her in his face. I have never said (and hope to never say),"Devon, I can't (blank) right now because I'm taking care of the baby." He is such a sensitive kid I don't want him to feel like I'm tending to her instead of taking care of him. All I have to say is,"In a second buddy," and I think I can get the same result without him feeling bad. I have, however, started wearing her in a "pouch" in the morning so I can play with him and not feel like I've just left her alone. It has been great to "play" with both of them at the same time and it also allows me to be hands free so Devon doesn't notice that much is different.

My first night home with Audrey was pretty easy. She only woke up twice to feed and once for a change and a snuggle. Joe and I were both so tired we hadn't figured out sleeping arrangements so we just had her in bed with us. The 3 months that Devon slept in the bed with me are some of the sweetest moments in my life with him as a baby. I only had him in the bed until he could roll over on his own and I also bumpered the bed (and floor, just in case) with pillows. I am a very deep sleeper and don't move around so I am not at all worried about rolling onto them. Co-sleeping made getting better sleep so much easier since I could a) be more attentive to their needs because I'm just an arms length away an b) could nurse laying down and sleep while doing it. Makes sense to me. Anyway, I awoke Friday morning reasonably well rested and was able to keep up with Devon all day and not be cranky.

Devon was much happier with me this morning and even was interacting with the baby on his own. He found her pacifier and had his pacifier in his other hand. He looked at both of them and could clearly tell they were different. He held hers out to me and said,"Audrey's". I told him that he was right and he went over to her, put the pacifier in her mouth and said,"Share." At that moment I knew that everything between them was going to be fine. He has not shown any jealously (I know it's week one, but still it's something) and even kissed her. Of course he now asks to hug her. He brought her a blanket (without me asking him to) and was asking to touch her foot. I am just so thrilled that he is doing all of these sweet things without ANY prompting from Joe and I and I have to say that I'm not totally surprised with my sweet little Devon's big brothering skills ;)

Joe has been amazing. I mean he IS amazing. I couldn't do this without him and it will be a rough adjustment when he goes back to work. The first morning I was home he got Devon out of bed, dressed and made breakfast. He played with him all morning, washed the sheets, made the bed, cleaned the kitchen, WASHED THE WINDOWS (inside and out), took Devon with him to the store and did the grocery shopping. He is constantly telling me to nap and rest and lay down. I knew that Joe would be helpful, but I am just so grateful to have a husband that is taking care of me to the extent that he is. He has totally stepped into his role of taking care of Devon and me as well as keeping the house clean. I think it has also empowered him to be more comfortable in the day-to-day stuff and figuring out his own way to do things. It's good for him to get a glimpse into my daily life and see that it's not just fun and playing. It was also nice to hear him say things like,"It is so hard to keep this house clean." and "Devon is a lot of work." Music to my stay-at-home-Mom-ears.

I have to say that I just feel so happy at this point of my life. I have my son, my daughter and I am in love with the most amazing man who walks this Earth. It does not come easily and is not taken for granted. I am so grateful for it all.